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The iPad is becoming top dog. Look how Apple’s marketing people are phrasing sentences that list all three iOS devices:

Past: From Apple’s (older) iOS 4 page: ”Download the free iOS 4.3 Software Update and get new features that let you do even more with your iPhone, iPad, and iPod touch.”

Current: Compare to Apple’s (newer) iCloud page: “Give us your email address and we’ll let you know when they’re available for your iPad, iPhone, or iPod touch.”

This says a lot.

This is a good joke:

A man died. At his trial in the heavenly court, he was found to be guilty of leading a life of sin, and so he was sentenced to go to Hell. He was escorted to the Devil’s waiting room, where he waited to be called. He was very depressed. Finally, it was his turn to be processed and admitted. With fear and a heavy heart, he entered the Devil’s office.

The Devil said, “What’s the problem, you look depressed?”

The man responded, “Well, what do you think? I’m going to Hell.”

The Devil said, “Hell’s not so bad, we actually have a lot of fun. Do you like to drink?”

The man said, “Sure, I love to drink.”

The Devil replied, “Well then, you are going to love Mondays. On Mondays we drink up a storm. You can have whiskey, rum, tequila, beer, whatever you want and as much as you want. We party all night long. You’ll love Mondays. Do you smoke?”

The man said, “Yes, as a matter of fact I do.”

The Devil replied, “You are going to love Tuesdays. Tuesday is smoke day. You get to smoke the finest cigars and best cigarettes available anywhere. And you smoke to your heart’s desire without worrying about cancer because you are already dead! Is that great or what? You are going to love Tuesdays. Do you do drugs?”

The man said, “Well in my younger days I experimented a little; never inhaled.”

The Devil replied, “You are going to love Wednesdays. That’s drug day. You can experiment with any drug you want and you don’t have to worry about overdoses or getting hooked because you are already dead. You are going to love Wednesdays. Do you gamble?”

The man said, “Yes, I love to gamble.”

The Devil replied, “You are going to love Thursdays because we gamble all day and night–black jack, craps, poker, slots, horse races, everything! You are going to love Thursdays. Are you gay?”

The man said, “Well, no I’m not.”

The Devil replied, “Oh, Fridays, then, uh, I don’t think you are going to enjoy Fridays…”

Yesterday, I received an email from my online brokerage house, TD Ameritrade, that outlined drastic reductions to minimum margin requirements (enabling investors to bet more money they don’t have). By allowing their customers more credit, they are increasing their own exposure. This is indicative of desperation (they make their money on per-trade fees). Be very careful. Given the current fiscal and economic environment, you should be more risk averse, not less.

The FBI has still not updated their web page or wanted poster for FBI Ten Most Wanted fugitive Osama Bin Laden to reflect the fact that the bounty on his head was doubled in 2007 from $25 million to $50 million, when the United States Senate voted 87-1 to do so. There’s a note on the page that the wanted “poster” was last updated in 2001.

It’s a whole new ballgame, and it surprises me that so many of our glorious race are so slow to catch on. On the heels of the Helen Thomas brouhaha, a North Carolina congressman is being embarrassed in the news today for assaulting a student on camera. We must all assume:

1. Anything that I say or do in public may be recorded or captured on film, and if it is, it will be broadcast to everyone in the world
2. Everything I publish online is public (irrespective of my privacy settings)
3. Any email I write may one day be sequestered as evidence in court